Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Cadillac pimpin'

You know, white people have higher standards for the automobiles that they drive -it's a fact. Most brothers are satified with a 20 year old luxury car as long as he can squeeze a fold out DVD/STEREO in it and outfit it with 32" chrome wagon wheels.

That being said, here is why black folk and caddys are funny.

I GOT'S A CADILLAC BUT,

-I HAVE TO OPEN MY DOOR TO ORDER AT THE DRIVE THROUGH BECAUSE MY ELECTRIC WINDOWS BE BROKE LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER

-I HAVE NO CLEARCOAT ON MY CAR BECAUSE THE PROJECTS THAT I LIVE IN HAVE NO COVERED PARKING

-THE UPHOLSTERY ON THE CEILING IS SO RIPPED IT LOOKS LIKE AN UPSIDE DOWN VELVET FIRE WHEN THE WINDOWS ARE DOWN (WHICH THEY USUALLY AREN'T CAUSE THEY BE BROKE LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER)

-MY STEREO SYSTEM COST ME $7000 AND MY DUBS COST ME $8000 BUT MY 1984 DEVILLE IS ONLY WORTH $400.

-MY STEREO IS MADE UP OF 90% SUBWOOFERS AND 10% 6X9'S THAT ARE LAID IN THE BACK DASH, NEVER INSTALLED CORRECTLY. FUCK THAT BULLSHIT.

-MY MOLDING IS PEELING OFF THE CAR SO I BOUGHT THEM CHROME LOOKING DOOR HANDLES AND VENTS THAT MAKE IT LOOK LIKE IT GO FAST. BUT IT DON'T.

-MY SEAT BACK ONLY HAS ONE POSITION, ALL THE WAY DOWN. I DRIVE BETTER WHEN ALL YOU SEE IS THE TIP OF MY HAT.

-I CAN'T HANG ENOUGH PINE TREE AIR FRESHENERS ON MY REAR VIEW MIRROR. CADILLAC NEEDS TO ENGINEER SOME HOOKS OR SOME SHIT THAT A NIGGA CAN HANG LIKE 200 OF THESE BITCHES ON.




I can go on and on. We all know it. Brothers will be brothers.

This is Afro.

Keepin' it real.

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