So you think you can rap?

I am sick and tired of rap music. It's boring, pointless and lacking musical structure. They tell these little jungle farts that this is the only way to escape the pressures and financial burdens of the ghetto. In all actuality, it keeps them there. Money doesn't change your destiny. Just ask T.I., Lil' Wayne, C-Murder, Tupac, Biggie, Lil' Boosie and R. Kelly about that.

All they know how to do is rap about money, bitches, rims and weed. That's because they are culturally challenged and have the aptitude of an ingrown pube. The fact that people like Randy Jackson actually promotes these shitbirds and encourages them to keep "creating" good music is laughable. Randy, you need to go and choke on a dick you overpaid blob of urban shit.

As long as black people find pleasure in ignorance we will never be rid of this shitty music. They subscribe to the stereotypes that they take offense to.

Isn't it ironic, dontcha think?

I would volunteer to be the recipient of a Cleveland Steamer if Soulja Boy was able to tell me what the accidental in a G major scale is. Him don't know bout dat. You can bet your ass he doesn't. He does, however, know how to infuse the economy with his earnings by buying chains that are 1/3 his body weight and depreciating assets like $60,000 Escalades with $12,000 in bling.

He would call me a hater. I'm not hating, I'm appreciating.

We really shouldn't complain. Black people SUCK at managing money. You want my opinion? If we really want to stimulate the economy, give them their reparations that they so desperately want. They will give it all back within a week. Before they do, I suggest we all buy stock in apple Jolly Ranchers and Cadillac. I don't need Jim Kramer to predict that for me, it's jigonomics.

Soulja Boy, if you are having someone read this to you because I can only assume you are dumber than John Coffee from Green Mile, the answer is F sharp.